Pickup lines

It's just one of those days where I can't really think of a post, but want to write something. So, why not put a little bit of the good, the bad, and the REALLY ugly pickup lines out there. Trust me, I've been privy to QUITE a few. One of my friends tends to think it's because I'm too easy to smile (I've definitely been told that I'm sucker for the Save the Children people, but that's because their tagline, DO YOU HAVE MOMENT TO CHANGE A CHILD"S LIFE, is too damn heartwarming. Sorry, have a heart, which is also a new discovery). Which, basically translates to, Stop being a freaking sucker E. I mean, I kind of agree. It's quite amazing that I'm not bankrupt from charitable donations--I thank sunglasses. Anyway, horrible one-liners after the jump, along with my reactions.

"Can I buy you a drink?" - I was drinking water

"Hey girl, what you listening to? Oh, Britney? I LOVE HER! She's my gurl. I love that song, Toxic. The taste of your lips.. I'm over itttttt"- Sadly, not uttered by an adorable gay man. Uttered by, an easily 200 lb pound, 6'2 black man. I mean, get it gurl, but really, not as an opener.

"You and I would make beautiful children together." Ok, sorry to disappoint, this one actually got me, because: 1) He was incredibly attractive and 2) IT WAS TRUE. We would make beautiful mixed race babies together. But, alas, twas not meant to be.

"Hey, want some of this tequila?" I was at a Regatta and he was a hot (rower!) man wearing spandex. I think you know how that ended.

"I can give you a ride home on my bike." It's a lot cooler if you think that it's a motorcycle, but....it was not.

...And I can't call out men (and sometimes, women. Though, I feel like lesbians tend to be smoother and nicer about hitting on me) without calling out some of the absolutely HORRENDOUS pickup lines that I've used on people.

"Wow. This scene is getting awkward--wanna makeout?" No.words.

"Oh my goodness. Did you just see that?!?!" Though, to be fair, a guy did drunkenly fall down the shorter flight of escalator stairs, so how can one not comment on something like that?

"You're a nurse...That's just so fascinating." I mean, helping people is great, but really, no. Pretty sure drunk E was just getting after it. Sorry!


What about you guys? What are the best/worst pickup lines that you've used/have been used on you?


Comments

  1. I must say it has been ages since I used a pickup line. These days i just say "HI" hasn't let me down yet hahaha...

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I wouldn't admit this to anyone but you guys

Let’s just talk about the elephant in the room…

Puffins, Seals, and Glaciers, OH MY!